Bigger Things by Ev Bishop

Author:Ev Bishop
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Fiction
ISBN: 9780993761706
Publisher: Winding Path Books
Published: 2017-02-21T16:00:00+00:00

16

Kyra lay in her tub. The tepid water was nice. Numbing. She wondered what the point was. Come to think of it, she wondered what was what point? She didn’t even really know what point she was searching for. Of her life? Of life in general? Of human existence altogether?

She slid her head and shoulders beneath the water to rinse the conditioner from her hair, and came up shivering but thinking of something more concrete, if just as depressing: Christmas. Just another day of special family togetherness. She’d actually called her aunt to suggest maybe sleeping over Christmas Eve, having the night together, opening presents together, and then getting dinner ready together.

Her aunt sounded horrified. “No, no. No sense in that. I only got you one present. It won’t take that long. Just come around three o’clock. We’ll eat at four. Your father’s coming.”

Her mind threatened to replay the phone call again. Don’t think, she implored herself. Rest.

She had been chilly, but the feeling was gone now. She lay motionless in the cooling water. Maybe death felt like this. A still, calm inertia. She wished she could turn her mind off and just enjoy this . . . this what? This just being, not feeling.

Her razor caught her eye, but she didn’t dare pick it up—and she didn’t let her mind go to the reasons why. Finally realizing the cold bath wasn’t working, she was still thinking and thinking and thinking, she got out.

Cold water is good for your skin. It closes your pores, doesn’t damage your capillaries the way hot water does. The beauty fact popped into her head and she latched on to it with relief. She analyzed her face in the mirror. Yes, her skin was looking good.

Later, as she made her way to her closet, she noticed that the message button on her phone was flashing. How very rare; she hadn’t checked her messages last night.

She pressed Play, and James’s slow drawl made her heart jump. “Hey, Kyra . . .”

Returning her call? This was positive. She pressed a button to restart the message from the beginning.

“Hey, Kyra . . . You’ve got to stop calling. I’m worried about you. Your messages are pretty intense. I think you need someone to talk to. Anyway, it really wasn’t you. Like I said, I think underneath it all, you’re an interesting person—and you’re sexy as—well, you’re sexy. But you’re just not my type. I’m into having a family and well, you’re into shallower, commercial stuff. Sorry. I hope you’ll be okay. This will be my last call. I’m getting engaged. My ex and I are back together. You can understand why you can’t call anymore.” There was dead space, like James had something else to say but then changed his mind. “I’m sorry,” he said again. There was a soft click.

“Asshole!” Kyra said to the machine, hating that tears had started. “You’re sorry? Sorry is nothing!” She sat down on her bed. Her voice grew quieter. “You should’ve told me what you wanted.

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